Originally posted on May 14, 2009
Shut
your foul-smelling pie-eating gob you butt-faced mud duck! You cry too much you
whiney little shit-throwing monkey! Get outta the left-hand lane you ugly,
raggedy, Mr. Magoo-driving toilet turd! 💩 I just plain can't stand people sometimes. If they aren't
being irritating in one of the standard ways, they'll find
creative ways to annoy the crap out of you. You know the people I
really can't stand most of all? It's those chronically
complaining, energy-vampires that suck all the positivity out of
everything-large or small. They see everything in life as a colossal conspiracy
against their personal happiness. You never want to call them back or run
into them at the local market for fear of them dragging you down to their
pitiful state of being. And I'm not talking about the occasional bad day which
nobody is immune from, I'm talking about every, single, cotton-pickin'
day. They NEVER have a good day or even a "fair" day. Every day is lousy for
these types of people and they wouldn't want or recognize a good
day if it moved in, did all the cooking & cleaning and paid all their bills!
Every time they trap you into what should be a normal
'how's the weather' kind of conversation, you feel like you're constantly
having to 'talk them off the ledge'. Well you know what I say to those
folks? I say, "Jump! Jump! Jump! And splatter your worthless guts all over
the filthy pavement!" 😡 I know I seem out of control, angry, bitter and mean. You
know what else? Right now, you're exactly right! I'm not asking for solutions or
suggestions or even understanding. My whole reasoning behind writing this
hateful blog is to hopefully feel better after getting all this garbage
out. Nobody has to understand or even read this. This is just
my explosion of frustrating negativity that will hopefully
work it's way out of my system by my purging & posting
my unthinkable thoughts here, in my blog. I'm no monster...most
of the time. 🤥 I'm not evil...usually. 😏 I'm a loving and
compassionate person...as a general rule. 🙄 The peculiar thing is, I
know I can control my aggressive anger and frustration when I really want to,
but wanting to is half the problem. Here's how I know I can do it
without as much effort as I pretend it takes. Even though I have neighbors I get into heated arguments with
over their blatant disrespect for anybody not in their immediate household, I
love my neighborhood very much (though I wish I could permanently
banish a couple of undesirables). In fact, I live very close to a cemetery
called Rosehill Cemetery. You'd think living close to a cemetery would be
creepy but I quite like it. First of all, the grounds are kept beautifully;
always green and well manicured. I see ex-mall walkers frequently and
respectfully walking around in there at all times of the day. Secondly, whenever
I drive by and see a funeral taking place, a person visiting a loved one that
has passed on or even new flowers & balloons at a gravesite I didn't see there
the day before, I'm reminded of how wonderful life is. 💞 When I see stuff like that, I get sad of course, thinking of
their loss and then my own but I walk into my house amazingly
grateful for the family I still get to spend quality time with. It's a very
somber and sobering feeling but still very beautiful in it's own way. 💖 When I drive down Rosehill Street every day from work, I
automatically turn my music down, no matter how low it was before. I drive very
carefully around there because you know I suffer from terrible road rage. 🤬 So when I'm on that street, I'm very cautious of people that
abruptly bolt out in front of me only to resume their 9 MPH speed. Even then, I
never EVER use my horn because of the possibility of people paying their
respects to loved ones (that I may not easily see at first glance). I drive down
that street like there's always someone there or there's a funeral going on.
Sometimes there isn't anything happening there and sometimes there is but I
always use Rosehill Respect when I'm near there. I don't care how hard
someone goats me into 'going off on them' (which I'm so good at), I would
never take the bait when I'm on that street. You would think that it'd be
a massive exercise in patience for me but it really isn't, not at all.
Nobody told me to be that way, it's just how I am. It wasn't until yesterday
that I finally accepted that I could use Rosehill Respect in other facets
of my life if I really wanted to (I'd been thinking about it for a while). 😳 Man! 😒 Already, right this very moment as I write this, I'm feeling
calmer and more loving just from thinking about that place. I want to scream,
"Rosehill Rocks!" but that seems inappropriate for obvious reasons. I
tell you, being one of God's flawed and complicated creatures is a wonderfully
interesting thing. Living life with zest, zeal and loving (almost) every minute
of it is all within our own control, no matter which of life's frustrating
curveballs we're hit in the head with. Right now, I'm thinking to myself,
'I can do it! I can be happy or at least gleefully content with my station
in life if I really want to.' I do believe that too, I really do. No
matter how many hateful words escape my lips or obnoxious behavior I'm
responsible for, I have lasting love for life and (most of) humanity. 😕 I just get a little angry and aggressive sometimes. Next time
I'm feeling like that though, I'll just take a deep breath, count to 10 (or 20)
and think of my Rosehill Respect. 🌹 If that doesn't work, I'll get a
baseball bat and beat the hell out of something useless, like some old junk or a
butt-faced ex-boyfriend. If I can't get all of my aggression out in the bedroom
the 'right' way, I'd better find a substitute that's
equally exhausting, violent and sweat-producing. 😜
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