Category : Romance and Relationships
Blog 36
Incomplete Thought Part II
I think I need some serious help. I recently thought long and hard about my place in the romantic relationship realm. I've diagnosed myself as having a SERIOUS case of R.R.A.A.D.D. (Romantic Relationship Adult Attention Deficit Disorder or RAD-squared)). I have (and had) great opportunities to find "success" in romance but I can't seem to motivate myself to go through with anything (for long). For example, I know this guy that's pretty interested. He's about my age and seems to have his head on straight but I can't seem to allow myself to "forge ahead" with him. I don't know why. I find him physically attractive, he's not overly occupied with irritating "family obligations" (I'll just leave that alone and seems to have ample time for me. I guess I'm just a little scared that he'll try to occupy all (or too much) of my time or that he'll become irritating and hard to deal with. He hasn't shown any obvious signs of those short-comings yet but I'm still scared. I know this other guy that lives kind of far from me but he's physically very attractive, slightly older than me, doesn't have any kids yet (like me) and wants to be married and have a family. I tried to keep myself motivated there too but I've lost so much steam, I'm not sure I can restore it. So, when he asked me if he'd already been "axed", I told him point blank what the issue is. I told him I'd do what I could (even more than what was necessary) if he could help inspire me a little. He hasn't yet come up with anything but I haven't given up hope that he will. I confess, I have to be continually motivated or inspired to stay interested (so do a lot of men). This past weekend, I did my best impression of "speed flirting" (like speed-dating) and it seemed to suit me perfectly but I can't imagine living that way would be very fulfilling for long. I'm definitely working on my R.R.A.A.D.D. but sometimes you simply have to resign yourself to the fact that "if it isn't in you, it isn't in you". Sure, I'm indecisive and painfully ambivalent with how I want my romantic life to be but this can't be all that there is! I mean, there have to be more answers out there! Maybe it's just a simple matter of bad timing. I'll continue to (impatiently) wait for a sign or "the one". I'm sure it'll happen eventually (that was a stab at positive thinking ). Don't worry, like always, you'll know when I do.
Posted : 2007-01-31 12:18:00 PM Created : 2007-01-31 12:33:00 PM Visible to : Public
Blog ID : 224361966
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