Originally posted on 5/5/2010
Current mood: stalked
Category: Romance and Relationships
♥
Are your needs always paramount? ♥ Would you notice that I'm having a bad day, when you're having a bad day? ♥ I want you to be loved, cared for and happy, do you want the same for me? ♥ If I am happy, are you doing all you can to keep me that way? ♥ On a sinking ship, you know I can be counted on, but can you?
♥
Are your needs always paramount? ♥ Would you notice that I'm having a bad day, when you're having a bad day? ♥ I want you to be loved, cared for and happy, do you want the same for me? ♥ If I am happy, are you doing all you can to keep me that way? ♥ On a sinking ship, you know I can be counted on, but can you?
♥
I believe the
answers to those questions are the foundation for true romantic
success♥. Keep
in mind though, that I wouldn't know true romantic
success♥
from another
hole in my azz. If I were in the market for a such a thing (true romantic
success♥-NOT another hole in my
azz), rest assured I would have my fair share of suitors. From the unshaven drunk dude waiting at the bus-stop
to the proud C.E.O. of Unemployed Inc.
, my 'romantic' prospects are abundant. I mentioned it briefly in the last entry but the random
Handyman
Saga got worse before it got better. He started calling the
house everyday for a while, sometimes well past 11PM. Sis kept urging me to take the call(s) and let him down
gently but I was afraid that if he got me on the phone, even once, he'd call
every time he got drunk, high or otherwise obsessed. His infatuation with me wasn't exactly unfounded, because
I'm one helluva chick, but
it was definitely "random". Like I said before, he and I have never even had a private
word with one another. Because of the size of my "animated" peepers, I've been
accused of looking like a psychotic serial killer when I attempt to lure suitors
in with my "sultry" eye contact......so it couldn't have been a steamy gaze from across the
room that he misinterpreted. His interest in me was totally out of The
Blue and his relentless pursuit, complete with his barrage
of unreturned calls, was just plain spooky. Sadly, it's obvious that this guy is only concerned about
his needs and desires and to hell with mine. Even if I entertained his interest in me, what kind of
lopsided
relationship debacle would that be? It's really strange how people become so fixated on their
own desires and wrapped up in their own little worlds, that they make no logical
sense whatsoever. This kind of attention is not the least bit flattering, just
colossally creepy! I thought all the unreturned calls sent a very clear message
but if not, he could have left one message for me
telling me he was interested in me, and for me to call him back *IF* I was
interested in him too. Instead, he let the phone calls mount into an uncomfortably
awkward mess that prompted the wife of the adorable couple that introduced him
to us, to make a surprise visit to our house Saturday morning. A couple days
before, Sis told the adorable wife's adorable husband, with whom Sis speaks to
almost daily, that the
handyman had been going WAY overboard with all the phone calls
for me. The husband of the adorable couple told Sis plainly,
"He's
a nice guy and all but tell your sister to stay away from him."
Um, yeah...I was already on that page. Sis was growing increasingly angry about the whole situation
and told the adorable husband, "He [the
handyman]
is setting his sights way too high!" (Spoken like a true, proud little sister.) But really, Sis
had become so agitated that I was afraid she might provoke him further. So I knew that next time he called, I'd just have to
politely tell him I have somebody, which is exactly what the adorable
wife suggested. Thankfully, he hasn't called back (yet). I guess maybe the
adorable couple talked to him. Whew! Another
possible catastrophe averted. I'm not claiming to be 'all
that' but an unsuspecting individual may never know when
somebody has an unhealthy obsession with them until it's too late. In my case,
who knows how many times he's passed my house or watched me take out my trash in
the dark? (He lives in my
neighborhood.) Terrifying! For me personally, there's also a technologically-threatening
aspect of all this that gives me pause. With so much of my life out there in cyberspace, I can just
imagine the many closet shrines built in my honor, with creepy red, toddler-like
scribbling across my pictures taunting; One day you'll be
mine or
We'll
always be together or Soon my
sweet. Okay, I may be using a little cinematic exaggeration to make
my point but what if I'm not? I could be a stain on my sheets and a story in the
Justice section of
CNN.com before
the truth is known. I'm really not exaggerating when I say that I got nervous
every time the phone rang or the dogs barked. For a while there, I was constantly staring out my windows
to see if I could see any trace of him, which is a horrible feeling to have when
you're inside your own home.
Your
sanctuary. Your supposed safe haven.
Stepping on my porch elicited an unfamiliar feeling of
insecurity that began to make me very uneasy. In fact, the last late-night handyman
phone call came about 2 minutes before my cell phone goes off from a text. ¹A
very small group of folks have my cell number and that group does
NOT
include the
handyman. ²Who
would text me that late at night anyway, even on a Friday night? Before I picked up my phone to read the text, I started
wondering if somehow the
handyman got my cell number through morbid means and would now
begin his robust cellular assault on me since so many of his (home) phone calls
went unanswered. I gingerly picked up my cell phone and read a simple
"Hi"
text from a number I did recognize.
The number belonged to probably my best guy friend, who happens to have been
my very first boyfriend (The Good
Ex ).
He and I hadn't spoken since July 2009 and hadn't exchanged
texts since September 2009. Relieved it was him, I replied back with an innocent
"Hey"
and put my phone back down. He replies back that I'd been on his mind and that
he loves me. Awww! Truthfully, with the way my week had been going, it was the
sweetest thing someone could tell me at that very moment. Even though he and I go months, sometimes years, without
communicating, we seem to have a connection that transcends the "normal"
standards of time. After the brief reaffirmation of deep and abiding love last
Friday night, we haven't spoken or exchanged texts since. I figured he's going
through something (marriage, divorce or some other
life transformation) and he wants reassurance me. I expected him to call the next day but he didn't, so
hopefully he got what he needed from me. I certainly got something meaningful
from him. It reconfirmed for me that some folks never forget your value, if
you're truly valuable.
(I am of course.) At times it becomes
overwhelmingly irritating when you feel taken for granted, whether or not it's
actually true. Sometimes it's just nice for someone tell you they care
about you, they love you and you're appreciated for being who you are, even if
the words from the seemingly unappreciative
aren't always forthcoming. After being savagely stalked and fearing for my life, it was
a welcome sentiment that I was very thankful for. And if nothing else, I can also be thankful that I live in
Texas,
where homeowners can legally give unwelcome intruders a 9MM root canal and
matching shotgun
enema. I love being a Texan...and a soon-to-be registered
gun owner.
No comments:
Post a Comment